Some items I’m thinking about this week, from around the web.
It’s true that work is stupid when you think you’re about to die, but when you don’t think you’re about to die, you need work. Because you need purpose. You each need to feel like there’s something bigger than yourself.
If I were to die tomorrow (like the ladies on Titanic who passed up dessert) would I still be doing what I’m doing? Would I regret having worked so hard for some delayed happiness years later? Dental school is no picnic. I couldn’t think of a good answer- until now. I do need something bigger, something down the road that I’m working towards.
- From NY Times Small Businesses blog by Jay Goltz
I think there are times when you should quit; for example, if you finally figure out that your business is not going to work, or that it is too demanding, or that you just aren’t happy…
It does help to maintain perspective. Nobody ever said business was easy. But it should become easier as you go along…If you have the brains and the ability and the means to start a business, you are one of the lucky minority who either make money on their own terms, or go broke trying! Hallelujah! God bless America.
Same thing. There are times when you should quit! I know for some people it makes complete sense to take time off dental school or to quit it completely. We have every right to make that decision for ourselves. (I think it’s the taking responsibility that’s the hard part, not the quitting itself.) But with Goltz’s second point (and I’m modifying it to fit dental school lives), we got this far! And we’re the lucky ones to be here.
Last point: I stumbled upon this and find myself turning to this idea time and time again.
Defusion is a term used by psychologists to describe a state of achieving distance from internal experiences such as thoughts and feelings. When you think a thought, it “colors” your world. When you see a thought from a distance, you can still see how it “colors” your world (you understand what it means), but you also see that you are doing the “coloring.” It would be as if you always wore yellow sunglasses and forgot you were wearing them. Defusion is like taking off your glasses and holding them several inches away from your face; then you can see how they make the world appear to be yellow instead of only seeing the yellow world.
When I’m getting frustrated or really upset, I ask myself what color glasses I’m wearing. It’s like a feeling check for when everything seems to go wrong. Often I find that it’s not the situation (or everyone else), it’s me. So I need to step away and do a feelings check, reset.
What color glasses are you wearing today? Happy? Anxious? Irritated? Hopeful?
(You can also think about the extent of this feeling. I’ve been feeling “quietly hopeful”.)