Early this week was one disaster after the other. On Sunday, I went in early morning to practice for our upcoming practical which was this Wednesday.
First, I started preparing the wrong tooth.
Then I did a completely different procedure from the one we were being tested on: an omnivac shell provisional on the tooth instead of a block carve provisional.
In my frustrated state, the entire procedure took longer than usual. I thought I was supposed to get better? I could not get the margins smooth and continuous with the prepared tooth surface for the life of me. And so on. By then I had been in lab for eight hours and my eyes were burning from the acrylic monomer fumes.
Sometimes you need to call it a day. And Sunday was most definitely one of those days.
So I did. I came home. At this point I was freaking out that I would not learn this procedure in time for our timed practical on Wednesday. I couldn’t even organize my room because I was so jumpy. I got myself into bed for a nap although I had a ton of things to do… and this nap turned out to be so much better than slaving away for hours in lab.
And Wednesday’s practical exam? I think it could have gone better. But this was an example where two values collided. I had to make a decision what was more important at the moment.
A few weeks ago my advisor asked me, “what does balanced life look like to you?” I believe a “balanced” life for me is not letting school define a good (or a bad) day. I’m trying to live my life that way. Better reset’s, better framing of these situations. It sometimes means letting go and “giving up”, if only for my sanity.