Monday, March 24, 2014

give and take

The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. Blessed be the name of the Lord. -Job 1:21

Earlier this week, I wrote a frantic email to a friend listing the ELEVEN things that were stressing me out right then. I just went back and read it. It is 940 words long and the most frantic thing I have written. It makes me anxious just to read some parts I wrote.

Getting back from spring break was difficult to get back into my dental school routine. We had an exam on pathology this Friday and I was so thoroughly exhausted after the exam.

To keep you updated on my RA adventures it had been causing me a lot of grief. I’ve been questioning my strength and ability in light of this possible new role- a lot. Right before my interview, I scheduled coffee with one of my favorite people in the world, Laura. She fills my world with positivity and clarity. I look forward to hanging out with her all week and I think of our conversation fondly for days afterwards. She got me in a “can-do” attitude for my meeting.

In addition to Laura, there is someone who has been helping me out with the entire process. He’s the one who recommended I read about Job. When I came upon 1:21 I couldn’t believe it: I’ve heard the first part of the verse, but not the second. I would have said something like “This sucks. But it’ll get better.” or “This sucks. But it’s part of life.” and console myself somehow. Definitely not “Blessed be the name of the Lord.”

Like, how would I know what I’m craving if I didn’t feel the pain? Spring break is sweet because it’s unlike my regular dental school routine. Waking up late upsets me because I crave efficiency and productivity. If I didn’t care for someone so much, whatever they do could never hurt me.

Another exam on Wednesday but I’m taking it slow, watching Moonrise Kingdom on this school night.weeknight

I love the lush, gorgeous colors and the whimsical characters. And of course, Sam and Suzy. Their love story is just too cute. Look at this scene, for example:

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I was trying to get back to focus mode- and having a hard time. Then Laura just texted me- she suggests I meditate for five minutes before getting started.

It’s a great Monday. Tomorrow in Philadelphia we are expecting snow.

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